Excitement & Attachment Blues
— From The Wise Old Sage Commentaries
Unconscious Entanglements – Instinctive Level
It is so easy to engage in these instinctiveInstinctive: 1. a non-reflective state of consciousness where we operate to guar… relationships. Placing all your attentionAttention: 1. The ability to focus ourselves in a way where we are Present with … on the potential partnerPartner: 1. a person who takes part in some activity in common with another or o… can prompt a response, ‘Oh, this person likes me’ What you need to do then is get them to want you as much as you want them. This is difficult because you are in a world of buzzy overwhelm, depending on your attraction level. ExcitementExcitement: 1. being agitated on a physical level due to the belief that some in… is coursing through your veins, driven by the fact that the object of your fixation is a better version of one of your parents (the one in your dreams). Of course, this is not a consciousConscious: 1. a state of presence that is aware of itself, self reflecting, and … thoughtThought: 1. electromagnetic fields that are born in the process of thinking 2. a… because this is an UnconsciousUnconscious: 1. a state driven by repressed fears and desires where we seek to a… Engagement. Instinctive level relationships are based on healing the imbalances between our sensations and feelings. We are trying to re-build our life energyLife Energy: 1. the process of escaping our conditioning by expressing ourselves… and intentionality, which was interrupted by the opposite gender parent if you are heterosexual and the same gender parent if you are homosexual.
Blind, immediate Love is an Exciting, Familiar event because it Mirrors Our Parental Patterns and Imprinting, eventually to our detriment.
Falling in loveFalling in Love: 1. the quality or state of being associated with Instinctive Lo… began with this parent, and we are not yet over it. Unconscious EntanglementsUnconscious Entanglements: 1. a limited partnership designed to entertain and ed… are infatuations where we blissfully contemplate how great being with someone is better than the creative denial, we got from this parent we are trying to replace. Ironically, we try to imagine how this infatuation will awaken us, maybe with a kiss, especially when we cannot get our expectations met or make our plans work. We continue to make excuses, or, heaven forbid, we create a superficial role-based relationship where we continue to dream by night and do nothing by day!
The value of successful Unconscious Engagements is that we become more experienced in our sexuality and create the illusionIllusion: 1. a Hindu term reflecting how partial beliefs about something do not … of safetySafety: 1. maintaining a state of well being in this moment 2. driving force of …. We find that temporarily sexuality does fill a hole we created by being isolated. The challenge is that imprintingImprinting: 1. an acceptance mechanism used by infants and young children to ens… conflicts, a lack of clarity about our purpose, and intellectualIntellectual: 1. a dualistic framework where our positions reflect a partial vie… stimulation make these first-generation co-dependent relationships chaotic and unstable. With Unconscious Entanglements, we are trying to build a personality that others will like and want to keep.
Excitement is a muddle of Fears and Desires meant to guarantee the Procreation of the race by isolating Consciousness in instinctive Fantasies.
In Higher AlignmentAlignment: 1. A condition of close cooperation or shared intention where compati… (click the word for the full definition), we have tracked and identified thousands of instinctive relationship choices. Almost everyone goes through a period of instinctive parental substitute choices, mostly with one parent, but sometimes a combination of both. What we are attracted to is familiarity. We see this pattern when individuals choose a partner with 14 of the 15 factors precisely the same as their parent.
Out of billions of unique options in the world, how is it that we choose the same combination twenty times in a row? It is our instinctInstinct: 1. inborn tendency to behave in a way characteristic of a species 2. a…. Our attractive type is so pervasive that even if we did not grow up with a particular parent, but we experienced them at birth, we will seek the best version of this parent without missing a heartbeat. We also make a variety of assumptions about what and who we want to fill in the gaps. These assumptions are often amplifying our fantasies at the cost of true compatibilityCompatibility: 1. The capacity to live together in harmony as a result of common….
The Delusion of Excitement is that being Familiar offsets our need to physically, emotionally and intellectually Bond before Sex.
The three indicators of desire on the instinctive level are attention, acknowledgment and acceptanceThe acknowledgment of another for some way of being (click the word for the full definition). To individuals that have been isolated, these types of outreaches mean loving physical connectionConnection: 1. the first step in the Seven Steps of Enlightened Dating where we …. We used these patterns to prove our expectations are like our partners, even if not. When we become infatuated with their beautyBeauty: 1. A state of awe, wonder and wholeness arising when we transcend our mi… or handsomeness, we will do anything to keep them around. Protecting our partners while being safe is how we establish our mutual acceptance that we care for one another. Our gender development and desire determine how we build a connection, mostly in our heads. This triggers pre-creative conditioning that drives us to possess and be possessed.
Instinctively we focus and expand our animalistic body desires (lustLust: 1. seeking temporarily indiscriminate sexual connections to minimize the l…, greedGreed: 1. a state of being where attachment to objects, beauty or handsomeness i… and arroganceArrogance: 1. A state of being wherein one is overly attached to what one knows,…) and use appearances to generate excitement to distract us from our fear of rejection. Looks, touch and smell are used at the instinctive level to guide our choices. The body experienceExperience: 1. the apprehension and transformation of reality, circumstances, or… triggers the attachment of falling in love. The problem is that this means different things to individuals because it sets up certain expectations.
We develop Attachments and Infatuation that eventually get old, dull and boring—reducing Excitement and leaving us with Guilt.
What we ignore is completing our body integration, where we embrace both our sensations and feelings so that we can be present in our bodies. Instinctive relationship baggage requires us to engage a partner without being entangled by our relationship to their problems. The more we become identified with their attachments, the less effective we are as partners. Imbalances need to be identified, talked about and healed without judgment.
By repressing sensations, we need romanceRomance: 1. quality or state of being in Love 2. an inspirational experience of … books or yoga to help us expand our body experience. We become obsessed with pornography by repressing our feelings, where images are easy substitutes for a complicated relationship. It is repressive sexual and creative conditioning that generates addictions and encourages possessive, jealous connections. Breaking up on the instinctive level occurs on average in 3 – 4 months, so we can go on to other unconscious acting assignments. Or we can complete our growthGrowth: 1. an evolutionary Aliveness or life building process 2. reflects an abi… lessons and engage our AutonomyAutonomy: 1. The fact or condition of being self-governed that allows us to sepa… on the intellectual level.