The Founder of Higher Alignment, a/k/a Larry Byram
I am a relationship coach for many years, working to bring about better human engagement. My gift is understanding the diversity of our creative nature. In my early years, this was a distant, non-embodied concept or idea. It took some personal transmutationTransmutation: 1. the process of transcending our habits or conditioning by reco…, transformationTransformation: 1. the ability to transcend our dualistic thought process and Em… and transfigurationTransfiguration: 1. a creative re-sourcing of possibilities within us that trans… to embody the realities of creative understanding. I needed to work with many people to appreciate their struggles, value their processes, and determine their creative virtues. I noticed the difference most when I could identify if they were my constituents, or I was theirs. Documenting these exchanges became part of my creative assessment process. Over the years I have witnessed their struggles, growthGrowth: 1. an evolutionary Aliveness or life building process 2. reflects an abi… and breakthroughs, and re-calibrated their development process to update the Higher AlignmentAlignment: 1. A condition of close cooperation or shared intention where compati… (click the word for the full definition) system.
The pictures of their business associates, partners and friends helped to reinforce the creative patterns I was recognizing. I examined every personality assessment process I could get my hands on, looking for the best way to name these issues. This led me to read psychology books and search for a more comprehensive creative understanding, which I first found in Alice Bailey’s Esoteric Psychology II book and eventually the Seven Rays of Life compendium book by the same author. Ten years later, I also discovered a similar structure in the Michael Teachings. These became the source documents of my creative relationship exploration.
After college, where I studied everything having to do with relationships, I applied my new understanding to choosing quality partners and selecting quality teammates in the organizations I led. This quickly taught me what worked and what did not. I identified the various levels and types of relationship opportunities and traps. I did relationship research as an avocation until 1989 when I taught about relationships and coached as my full-time job.
This led me to release the consciousness tools of MotivesMotives: 1. the primary Intent behind thought, action and deed 2. primarily orga…, Attractions, Skills and Compatibility FactorsCompatibility Factors: 1. a set of creative distinctions which highlight differe…. Since then, I have creatively assessed over 50,000 people and consulted with and coached more than 7,000 couples. We provide over 100 relationship courses at HigherAlignment.com. In the early 2000’s we wrote about all the Higher Alignment distinctions at Alignment Technologies.us. We are now transiting to a new learning environment via Higher Alignment.com.
Use our years of practice building effortless, quality relationships so you can benefit from a comprehensive, accelerated consciousness raising process.
On a personal note, my relationships have become more integrated and multi-dimensional. I no longer focus on personal relationships because so many business relationships have emerged. This does not mean I have not made and continue to make poor relationship choices for idealization is, as we know, a powerful force in the world. How do we expand the number of conscious relationshipsConscious Relationships: 1. any type of relationship wherein both parties unders… to make the world more fun? This blog is my way to address the critical issue of the lack of people knowing how to be with each other. The personal challenge I have is making the complex simple, enabling us to see the humor of relationships at work. I want to awaken others without having to make myself the center of the story. In the classes, we make you the center of the story.
Fortunately, I am old so I do not take myself seriously when I reveal what is authentic to me. Maybe I have nothing to lose! This paradoxical ‘passionate indifference’ comes from recognizing that most of what I say may not predictably translate to others. This has led me to see many new possibilities and many new ways of explaining myself, hence my apparent wisdomWisdom: 1. the quality of being wise 2. power of discriminating appropriately in…. Since my Wise Old Sage is a speaker of the profound, this is the one part of this persona that may find it hard to live up to your expectations.
By talking in the voice of the Wise Old Sage, I can also attack my self-importance and regain a little humility by laughing at myself. This is particularly healing when dealing with the relationship dilemmas of Objectification, Subjectification and Idealization. These distortions, caused by outer attachments, emotional or intellectualIntellectual: 1. a dualistic framework where our positions reflect a partial vie… positions, and projections of self-importance, are a lot of work to manage. The real question is: why bother?
Since we all have different creative designs and missions, the recognition of alignment with others validates our mutual perceptions and contributions. We all grow best from those most aligned to us. We will see from your response whether you find this also to be true. My job as the Wise Old Sage is to make the cost of being unconsciousUnconscious: 1. a state driven by repressed fears and desires where we seek to a… about relationships clear I will do this by imagining you without your defenses, pretensesPretenses: 1. specialized roles we develop to enhance our ability to superficial… and imprintingImprinting: 1. an acceptance mechanism used by infants and young children to ens… that deaden you to your life.
The Wise Old Sage is the part of me that knows being serious can lead to misinterpretation and even reactive confusion. Some individuals feel challenged by an inner state of certainty, usually responding with and with a dash of projections. I would invite you to be as imaginative as possible, recognizing that this counters certainty. For this reason, I respectfully hold back any fixed structure in order to co-create this experienceExperience: 1. the apprehension and transformation of reality, circumstances, or… with you as equals.
As a Wise Old Sage, I am a provocateur and creative instigator, awakening new ways of seeing the world. My area of interest is harmonic, co-creative relationships. First, I want to elevate the discussion of determining who we are as authentic beings. Second, I want to describe and illustrate how unhealthy attachments, positions, and projections lead to self-compromise and selfish, self-denial patterns. In effect, our personality identities are becoming more destructive to us, to each other, and to the planet each day The isolation, separateness, and insulation are creating big demands for the amount of the people on the planet, and we can’t avoid each other as easily as before. Third, this means we need to clarify that dualistic attractions, reactions and motives that we use every day are not, in fact, our highest expression. Instead of living a life of constant polarization and duality, we have difficulty finding the middle path. We need to use consciousConscious: 1. a state of presence that is aware of itself, self reflecting, and … Motives, Attractions and Relationship skillsRelationship Skills: 1. a set of perceptual distinctions that represent twelve d… to heal our internal dissonance so we can engage others in a state of wholeness and creative responsiveness. Finally, this means we need to shift from personal competition to transpersonal cooperationCooperation: 1. unified, responsive, forthright action done together for a commo… and begin to trustTrust: 1. faith or confidence in the honesty, integrity, reliability, justice, e… that operating in our creative capacity will produce access to diverse types of solutions.
Our current focus is to support many of you to become Co-Creative Relationship Heroines or Heroes, pioneering your own authentic life contributions.
As an educator, Wise Old Sage will be inviting individuals to see their higher creative nature. For many, this will initially seem idealistic. This insight indicates that we are likely in the last stage of personality development and do not yet know or accept our full creative beingCreative Being: 1. the unity of consciousness embodied as identification with ou…. The giveaway is how much we speak about our creative greatness without relying on any personality self-importance (no name dropping for us). We use this indicator to name our highest contribution and how we currently deliver that experience daily. Another indicator is that our relationships stimulate us to see ourselves in new ways, mainly when a person represents where we’re trying to go. When we idealize others, it creates adulation through identification with some exalted person. More vicious is when idealize ourselves and project why others should treat us better. These distortions keep us from having authentic connections with others.  Â
Wise Old Sage is a didactic device to stimulate thoughtThought: 1. electromagnetic fields that are born in the process of thinking 2. a… and to move the discourse along. The Wise Old Sage is the higher purpose integrator and personal relationship facilitator. What you will hear form me is not a position, belief, or attachment to some particular way of being. Instead, it will be a reflection of whatever is needed to help complete the conversation. The commentary is based on the personal research and discoveries we have made in relationships. You are not required to agree with any of our conclusions. Some of them are downright irritating; others will have you questioning your sanity. This perspective has developed over many years of trial and error, and I recognize that not everything we say will make rational sense. Nevertheless, I seek to present it in a coherent framework.
The principals of relationship begin in relating to yourself, so you can fluidly and harmlessly express your beauty, truth and goodness without compromise.
Some individuals will find it difficult because we invented some new terminology to describe various patterns, forces, and expressions. We took it upon ourselves to establish these markers and define these terms to evolve the understanding of relationships because it is currently operating on a fifth-grade level. We do not yet know in our expression that we are truly creative gifts. We do not recognize the obstacles from personality development that promote defensive differences.
A lack of conscious distinctions keeps us from seeing how compromises lead to empty, unfulfilling lives. Motives, Attractions, Skills, and types of Love are methods of healing that need to be engaged to create conscious embodiment. When they are understood, these terms will provide a way to facilitate the transition from personality to the development of our Creative SelfCreative Self: 1. a state of Being of connection to the Universe where we natura…. For the most part, these terms are incredibly uplifting because most relationship terms are used to integrate us. Where we lack terms or language, we have attempted to use common terminology to help describe what we are talking about.
So, the Wise Old Sage is not going to play this word definition game. Instead, based on your history, I will only be as insulting as you have been to yourself by reminding you of ways you have limited your own choices. Any time you are triggered by something I am saying, ask yourself what you are reacting to. Consider how I might be opening a new door to see things from a different perspective. Why would I want to insult you? I do not even know you yet!
And no, I am not a shock jock who needs reactions no matter how they show up. The central paradoxParadox: 1. a statement of two simultaneously conflicting truths that encourage … is how can I talk about the behavior, motives and false self-identifications harmlessly? Note to my reader: these are all untrue patterns, but you might think they are true. My answer is not to take myself seriously. Be in a state of self-humor with perhaps a dose of refreshing discovery. The Wise Old Sage is there for everyone struggling to emerge from the cocoon of the personality and become a creative butterfly.Â
We do not objectify, subjectify or idealize our clients because personal safety, security and self-importance are over-rated and doing so just makes everything worse.
As a humorist, the Wise Old Sage would be the first to admit that he did not so much invent the problems as define the fault lines of humanity by giving them names. As the person who defined the issue and the first to test them fully, I can personally verify that they have despicable effects. Realizing my own mistakes has made me more interested in turning objectification, subjectification and idealization into the conscious and peaceful states of Autonomous AlivenessAliveness: 1. The capacity to engage others in a vibrant and awakened manner wit…, Intimate Vulnerability, and Creative Responsiveness.
Exploring the source of these wounds has also made me conscious of how we use guilt, shame and blame to make ourselves feel better. The Wise Old Sage suggests that our battle with others and ourselves is misplaced, arising from our reactions to differences we do not yet understand. If you let me be your guide, we can begin to clear up and clean out this mess.
If you are reading Higher Alignment materials, my job is to challenge your self-imposed limitations until you laugh, cry or both. Bringing laughter to pain allows us to unlock the problems we have. This is how we learn. We need to get intentIntent: 1. a reflection of will, either personal or Universal, that defines our …, contentContent: 1. the outer appearance, item or thought that defines the set of possib… and contextContext: 1. the experiential container that permits us to see how the content re… in alignment for the result we desire to occur. It also helps us to be transpersonal in our intent because combining our consciousness with others uplifts and balances it. This, when knowing our creative gifts, allows us to ultimately show up.
The evolution of consciousness requires integrating different levels of wisdom and navigating to know what each group of terms contributes to any situation. You will notice that the terms are always sequenced in four levels with three expressions (masculineMasculine: 1. on a Gender Identity level, it reflects operating as a male 2. bey…, feminineFeminine: 1. on a Gender Identity level it refers to being female 2. on levels b…, or combined). If anyone has a better term, we are always opened to considering it. We see this process as an evolving, breathing expression of Life, Light, and Love. Therefore, in conscious relationships, we are constantly evolving and becoming clearer over time.
As a Wise Old Sage, what I care most about is bringing laughter and wisdom to people so, as a planet, we can learn how to consciously relate to each other.
For some, the Higher Alignment structure seems very intellectual or even academic. This is because it is described in intellectual terms which seem to ignore the variety and capability of the states of being involved. Being present to our video classes allow us to see things from different angles that accelerates learning. The re-creation of our experiences so we can recapitulate the essence that drove the experience allows us to re-make our perspective in a new way. This is the Higher Alignment method. We can either make a change by the way we move our focus or shape a change by creating a new context. The focus on stillness, solitude and silenceSilence: 1. the process of affirming and releasing thoughts so that we can deepe… are the final elements that come into play.
Rest assured, we spend as much time experiencing different modalities (sensations, feelings, emotions, thoughts) and higher wisdom (intuitionIntuition: 1. a state of perception of the Self where our creative nature is hon…, straight knowing, and unityUnity: 1. the state of being one, or united, oneness 2. something complete in it… thinking) as we do with the Higher Alignment structure. It is interesting to hear the stories of others and begin to understand the forces at play that convinced them to act as they did. Since everyone is trying to do the best they can, their examples transform thoughts about relationships into real case studies.Â
We are working on new tools that go beyond our current training videos. We are also seeking defined ways to reach more people so they can benefit from these creative insights. The appreciationAppreciation: 1. The acknowledgment of alignment in our intent with another 2. T… of relationship differences requires reducing the cost, so it is accessible to everyone. The benefits will be greater understanding about what are appropriate, frictionless and fun relationships. We also want to find new ways to translate this work for teachers, coaches and therapists and, to that end, we are creating a way to subsidize those individuals.
Playfulness leads to exploration and testing our safety zone. This is an opportunity to expand your comfort zone, so you can claim the relationships you want.
My experience has led me to see the healing power of humor. You will notice my comedic voice entering from different directions to expand the creative context for our relationship. Using surprise, shifting sub-context, and comedic perspectives can teach us more about ourselves. Comedy allows me not only to educate but entertain people as I do so. Like any magician, misdirection is used to make us re-examine our perceptions. But, unlike a magician, the process will open a new way of operating in more creative, equal and fun-loving relationships. When Common Neutral GroundCommon Neutral Ground: 1. The capacity to create a neutral independent relations… is added to this mix, our ability to communicate harmlessly and deal with differences will expand easily.
Higher Alignment is not just an intellectual process because it starts with creative intuition and ends with energetic embodiment and calibrated states of well-being.
I am honored to witness this transformation, where consciousness awakens and ensures our creative expansion. Making this dream a reality is the work of the Wise Old Sage. You are invited to laugh, communicate, or curse my suggestions. I would prefer that you do not objectify your image of me (for that would isolate us), subjectify or impose my thoughts over yours (for that would separate us), or idolize or elevate my standing over yours (for this would make us insulated, unloving enemies). You can do all this by not taking what I say personally.
I appreciate the time you take to read this material and your commitmentCommitment: 1. A pledge or promise to engage or produce some result 2. A quality… to testing it out. The four-dimensional experience of our relationships shows up the way it does because we do not know how to unlock our higher powers. Each level opens up a new type of awareness which reveals another landscape of relationship interaction. While most of us have been stumbling around in the three co-dependent levels, a few of us have found our way to higher co-creative levels. We aspire to make these levels more accessible to Cultural Creatives.
Listen to the conversations and view the videos of our classes and free presentations to find out more.
Imagine that we are equal creative friends trying to make the world a better place. This is my invitation and promise that together we can do this. In my Wise Old Sage persona, I fight for our ability to be great and recognize that it also sets us up for a greater win every time we fail. My authentic creative self needs to operate as equals with truthfulness, goodness and grace.
My job is to see the perfection in your imperfection by being with you in stillness, silence and solitude, so you are fully witnessed. The quiet guy does most of the work affirming your creative greatness. It accomplishes this by presenting many ways to view yourself and your growth. The wise guy within me took this job when my creative consciousness realized that I was not showing up for myself. This vacancy allowed me to move right in and start to speak out. Should you choose to accept this mission, your job is to honor your creative greatness and invite others to participate with you. This is how we grow conscious, planet-wide.
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Communicate with me, your Wise Old Sage (email link)